Revising a Manuscript: The Developmental Phase | Post 14
How developing a manuscript compares to the experience of postpartum
Sorry, I’m late. Worse than that, I have nothing for Substack this month. I have less than four weeks left to complete the revision of my book baby, Bloodbird, and I’m not going to lie, it’s DEFCON 1 over here. Poor choice of words, I suppose, considering the clusterfuck Israemerica has forced upon us. But I digress.
A debut author’s first book must be the same as a human newborn. Because I am a mom and this is my first book. And this period of my life feels like déjà vu. This is what’s been happening to me (again):
spontaneous wailing followed by unprovoked bouts of hysterical laughter
second-guessing myself and consulting the internet and books consistently throughout the day
not being able to recall when the last time was that I took a shower
not knowing what the date is
sleeplessness
general brain fog
forgetting birthdays
postponing coffee dates
crippling guilt when taking breaks or doing something fun
day drinking
shedding a lot of hair (clogging up the drainpipe type)
clean laundry to be packed away piling up
overwhelming sense of dread that I’m not good enough to do this
clinging onto the fact that while this period is hard the rewards will come later
and when I look at it sometimes I think how it’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever made
And that’s really all I have to say.
Luckily, I’m not alone. The potted snake plant on my desk is flowering. Apparently this signifies rare, positive energy, the fulfilment of hard work, or a coming season of fortune. I feel so seen. This plant knows.
And now you do too.
Bye for now.
E


Your intuitive connection with your plant companion is telling...
All the best with everything.